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Archive of: Difficult Emotions

  • Dealing with Shame: How to Weaken its Destructive Hold over You

    Dealing with Shame: How to Weaken its Destructive Hold over You

    Have you ever felt shame? I’m sure you have at some point in your life. All of us have. Shame is that awful feeling of being worthless, rejected or cast out. Deeply painful, it brings humiliation and distress in its wake. Its close cousin is guilt. Guilt shows up when you believe you have done something bad; shame shows up when you believe you are bad, so much so, that you are totally unlovable. Shame’s toxicity does not end there though. It also carries with it a sense of helplessness, that there is nothing you can do to purge yourself of its burdensome and soul-crushing presence…

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  • Alleviate Suffering by Changing Your Perspective

    Alleviate Suffering by Changing Your Perspective

    I don’t know what’s been going on with the planet’s energy patterns recently, but these last few months have been tough. Have you found that too? I certainly have. I’ve seen difficult issues surface in my own life, my family’s lives and in my clients’ lives. Everyone seems to be sicker, more fearful, and more distressed than usual. At the end of March I was told I was burnt out, so I took heed and had a complete break from everything: this did me immense good. I now feel like I’m getting back to my usual positive and energetic self. The time out not only allowed me to regenerate and rejuvenate …

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  • How to Recognise and Deal with Your Anxiety Type

    How to Recognise and Deal with Your Anxiety Type

    I was rather taken aback recently when I saw that in October this year 22,573 searches were carried out on the Counselling Directory using the keyword ‘anxiety’? I don’t know why that surprised me. We all know that one in four of us will experience some sort of mental health problem each year, and anxiety is certainly the most prevalent issue that brings people to my counselling and coaching practice. If you’ve read some of my earlier blogs, you’ll know that generalised anxiety and panic disorder plagued …

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  • How to Transform Your Emotional State Through the Power of Reframing

    How to Transform Your Emotional State Through the Power of Reframing

    Can you recall the last time you felt bad about something in your life? Do you remember how you felt - and why you felt that way? What would you say if I told you that you could have used a simple technique to instantly transform your emotions and feel better? And that it’s something you can easily learn to do. One of the greatest shifts I made on my own personal development journey was to realise that everything I experienced in life was actually happening entirely in my own mind and body…

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  • The Healing Power of Writing

    The Healing Power of Writing

    When was the last time you had some kind of emotional meltdown? Perhaps you lost your cool with someone … or suffered a debilitating wave of anxiety … were plagued by intense, painful feelings of guilt … or felt overwhelmed by grief and sadness. We’ve all experienced moments when our emotions have got the better of us - moments that have left us feeling vulnerable, confused and lost. Do you know that there’s something you can do in those very moments to help yourself? Something that…

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  • Is it a Crisis or an Awakening?

    Is it a Crisis or an Awakening?

    It is truly amazing how within a split second everything in a person’s life can dramatically change . I experienced such a moment a few weeks ago. It was a very normal Monday. I was having a good day. I remember feeling well, happy and calm. The sun was shining. All my client appointments for the week were fully booked. Life was good. That was until l received a text from my son telling me that my husband had had a heart attack. He had been resuscitated a number of times. And, I urgently …

    Comments: 2

  • How to Resolve Inner Conflict and Find Peace

    How to Resolve Inner Conflict and Find Peace

    One of the key things I look out for in my work with clients is inner conflict. It is fascinating how much warfare goes on inside a person. It is also disturbing because this sort of tension, left unchecked, inevitably creates emotional turmoil and dis-ease. Can you relate to this scenario? You are lying in bed, warm and cozy when the alarm goes off. You want to stay exactly where you are but a voice in your head starts nagging you to get up. You resist it for a short while but it continues to get louder and louder…

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  • What Should We Tell Our Sons?

    What Should We Tell Our Sons?

    If there is one message that any young man who would like to feel happy, healthy and content needs to internalise, it is to let go of other people’s expectations. As parents it is often our expectations of our sons that have the potential to cause them the most harm. Young men are bombarded with “You should…” messages from an early age. These messages are always well-intentioned, and can include expectations on their behaviour, friendships, academic achievement, relationships, career choices and social activities.

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  • The 7 Myths About Counselling

    The 7 Myths About Counselling

    Take a moment and cast your mind back over your life. Would you say that your life has been completely trouble free? Do you know anyone who has lived a totally problem-free life? A person who has never faced a difficulty, a challenge, a distressing experience or a significant life change such as bereavement, divorce, redundancy or illness? I certainly haven’t lived such a life, or know of anyone who has. The business of living can be tough at times. We all experience family …

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  • Are You Tired of Dealing With That Irritating Person in Your Life?

    Are You Tired of Dealing With That Irritating Person in Your Life?

    Is there someone in your life that really gets on your nerves? You know, that person who you wish would stop being such a pain all the time. It could be your friend…your boss…your spouse…your parent…your child…your colleague. We all have these people in our lives. And, sadly, they have the potential to cause us a lot of misery and heartache. So what is your story? Do you endless wish for your spouse to be more attentive Your parent to be more accepting? Your child to be more motivated? Your boss to be more appreciative? Your friend to be more considerate?

    Comments: 2

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