06 December 2018
You probably know as well as I do that the quality of our relationships directly affects the quality of our lives. Healthy relationships are good for us. They have a positive effect on our mental and physical health, enhance our lives, help us grow into better versions of ourselves, and even cause us to live longer. Unhealthy relationships are not good for us. They have an adverse effect on our mental and physical health; they diminish the quality of our lives, cause us pain and hurt, and degrade us. People who value their inner peace and happiness always keep their relationships under regular review …
01 November 2018
You may recall that last month I began a series of newsletters focusing on the personal habits of happy people. Happy people tend to think and behave in ways that allow them to feel peaceful and content, no matter what’s going on around them. With a little effort, we can all learn to do this. The first of these habits, which I wrote about last time, was letting go of grudges. This month I’m going to focus on happiness habit two: how to not take things too personally. I think you’ll agree that many people struggle with this one. Someone says or does something, and before you know it your mood has plummeted and you’re upset or angry….
12 March 2018
Is there someone in your life who’s always creating drama? You know, the person who constantly overreacts to everyday events and behaves in a melodramatic, attention-seeking way. They always have a crisis going on: always someone to be angry with, something to complain about, something to cry about. Peace and balance are not qualities that you can readily associate with this person. In fact, conflict with others seems to be their natural default position. If you’ve ever associated with someone who loves drama…
13 December 2017
Christmas is meant to be a time of joy, peace and merriment. I think there’s a part of all of us that buys into that fairytale image of an open log fire, a beautifully decked out tree, piles of presents, cards, food, drink and a smiling, loving family. Yes, that’s right … I said ‘family’. For some people that word is enough to pop the fantasy bubble right away! Most of us get to spend time with family at Christmas. But, for some, that reality is about as far away from joy, peace and merriment as you can get. In fact, it’s often the cause of great anxiety and dread. A couple of people have articulated this sentiment in my …
15 April 2016
Would you say that your current relationships are generally warm, nurturing and harmonious? Do you believe that the world is a safe and secure place: a place in which you can lean on people, take emotional risks, and trust that people will be there for you in your time of need? Do you believe that people are generally on your side, and will support you in the way that you need them to, when you need them to? You may be surprised to hear that your parents have influenced your answers to these questions…
31 January 2016
If there is one message that any young man who would like to feel happy, healthy and content needs to internalise, it is to let go of other people’s expectations. As parents it is often our expectations of our sons that have the potential to cause them the most harm. Young men are bombarded with “You should…” messages from an early age. These messages are always well-intentioned, and can include expectations on their behaviour, friendships, academic achievement, relationships, career choices and social activities.
26 November 2015
Is there someone in your life that really gets on your nerves? You know, that person who you wish would stop being such a pain all the time. It could be your friend…your boss…your spouse…your parent…your child…your colleague. We all have these people in our lives. And, sadly, they have the potential to cause us a lot of misery and heartache. So what is your story? Do you endless wish for your spouse to be more attentive Your parent to be more accepting? Your child to be more motivated? Your boss to be more appreciative? Your friend to be more considerate?