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Archive of: Difficult Emotions

  • How to Recognise and Deal with Your Anxiety Type

    I was rather taken aback recently when I saw that in October this year 22,573 searches were carried out on the Counselling Directory using the keyword ‘anxiety’? I don’t know why that surprised me. We all know that one in four of us will experience some sort of mental health problem each year, and anxiety is certainly the most prevalent issue that brings people to my counselling and coaching practice. If you’ve read some of my earlier blogs, you’ll know that generalised anxiety and panic disorder plagued …

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  • How to Transform Your Emotional State Through the Power of Reframing

    Can you recall the last time you felt bad about something in your life? Do you remember how you felt - and why you felt that way? What would you say if I told you that you could have used a simple technique to instantly transform your emotions and feel better? And that it’s something you can easily learn to do. One of the greatest shifts I made on my own personal development journey was to realise that everything I experienced in life was actually happening entirely in my own mind and body…

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  • The Healing Power of Writing

    When was the last time you had some kind of emotional meltdown? Perhaps you lost your cool with someone … or suffered a debilitating wave of anxiety … were plagued by intense, painful feelings of guilt … or felt overwhelmed by grief and sadness. We’ve all experienced moments when our emotions have got the better of us - moments that have left us feeling vulnerable, confused and lost. Do you know that there’s something you can do in those very moments to help yourself? Something that…

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  • Is it a Crisis or an Awakening?

    It is truly amazing how within a split second everything in a person’s life can dramatically change . I experienced such a moment a few weeks ago. It was a very normal Monday. I was having a good day. I remember feeling well, happy and calm. The sun was shining. All my client appointments for the week were fully booked. Life was good. That was until l received a text from my son telling me that my husband had had a heart attack. He had been resuscitated a number of times. And, I urgently …

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  • How to Resolve Inner Conflict and Find Peace

    One of the key things I look out for in my work with clients is inner conflict. It is fascinating how much warfare goes on inside a person. It is also disturbing because this sort of tension, left unchecked, inevitably creates emotional turmoil and dis-ease. Can you relate to this scenario? You are lying in bed, warm and cozy when the alarm goes off. You want to stay exactly where you are but a voice in your head starts nagging you to get up. You resist it for a short while but it continues to get louder and louder…

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  • What Should We Tell Our Sons?

    If there is one message that any young man who would like to feel happy, healthy and content needs to internalise, it is to let go of other people’s expectations. As parents it is often our expectations of our sons that have the potential to cause them the most harm. Young men are bombarded with “You should…” messages from an early age. These messages are always well-intentioned, and can include expectations on their behaviour, friendships, academic achievement, relationships, career choices and social activities.

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  • The 7 Myths About Counselling

    Take a moment and cast your mind back over your life. Would you say that your life has been completely trouble free? Do you know anyone who has lived a totally problem-free life? A person who has never faced a difficulty, a challenge, a distressing experience or a significant life change such as bereavement, divorce, redundancy or illness? I certainly haven’t lived such a life, or know of anyone who has. The business of living can be tough at times. We all experience family …

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  • Are You Tired of Dealing With That Irritating Person in Your Life?

    Is there someone in your life that really gets on your nerves? You know, that person who you wish would stop being such a pain all the time. It could be your friend…your boss…your spouse…your parent…your child…your colleague. We all have these people in our lives. And, sadly, they have the potential to cause us a lot of misery and heartache. So what is your story? Do you endless wish for your spouse to be more attentive Your parent to be more accepting? Your child to be more motivated? Your boss to be more appreciative? Your friend to be more considerate?

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  • How Avoiding Your Emotions May Be Harming You

    If I could go back thirty years and give my younger self some advice it would be to “stop avoiding your emotions.” Back in those days, I expended a lot of energy suppressing my feelings. I tried hard to fit in, do the right thing, and avoid drama of any kind. I had emotional regulation down to a fine art. The world saw me as calm, quiet and amiable, while deep inside there was turmoil and emotional chaos. It took me a long time to figure out that …

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  • The Day I Met a Goblin and Finally Healed My Fear

    Have you ever experienced an intense emotion that has left you feeling frightened, confused and deeply disturbed? I certainly have. In fact, there was a time in my life when it was a regular occurrence. When I tell people now that I spent most of my late teens and twenties in a perpetual state of fear, due to chronic anxiety and panic disorder, I am often met with surprise; disbelief even…

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