How to Forgive the People Who Have Hurt You
Is there a person in your life you’re harbouring anger and resentment towards? Someone you can’t bring yourself to forgive for what they’ve done to you? When someone has abused us; attacked, cheated, betrayed, rejected, ridiculed or ignored us; treated us unfairly or taken advantage of us, the pain and trauma can run deep and be difficult to come back from. Why, you might ask, when they’ve hurt you should you seek to forgive? There is one good reason, and that is to put an end to your own suffering. Holding onto feelings of anger, bitterness, hatred or resentment towards another not only keeps you bound to that person, emotionally and energetically, it also causes ongoing …
How to Recognise and Deal with Your Anxiety Type
I was rather taken aback recently when I saw that in October this year 22,573 searches were carried out on the Counselling Directory using the keyword ‘anxiety’? I don’t know why that surprised me. We all know that one in four of us will experience some sort of mental health problem each year, and anxiety is certainly the most prevalent issue that brings people to my counselling and coaching practice. If you’ve read some of my earlier blogs, you’ll know that generalised anxiety and panic disorder plagued …
Is Your Morning Routine Making or Breaking Your Day?
Let me take you back to this morning and ask how you began your day. Did you have a calm, quiet and orderly start? Or, was it rushed, manic and frenzied? How we choose to spend the first minutes and hours of the day has a significant effect on all those that follow. What we do - and how we feel - sets the tone for the entire day. That has certainly been my experience. On an ideal day, I get out of bed at …
Always Feeling Bad about Not Getting Things Done?
If there is one thing that can really damage a person’s sense of self, cause unnecessary stress, and lead to constant feelings of misery and guilt, it is the habit of procrastination. Self-sabotage comes in many shapes and sizes but procrastination is by far the most common. Are you a procrastinator? Are you always putting things off until tomorrow? How does that make you feel? Good about yourself …
Can You Seriously Afford to Not Speak Your Truth?
‘Ek chup, sau sukh’ is a saying from my culture, which if you share my Indian heritage you will definitely have heard many times. Loosely translated it means ‘staying quiet (and, I’ll add, compliant) leads to greater ease in life’. I grew up with this message. I consider it to be one of the gems of wisdom my mother passed onto me; one that has stood me in good stead over the years. There is definitely …
Conquer Stress and Anxiety with this Deceptively Simple Breathing Exercise
Let me start by asking you a question. What is your breathing like right now? Are you breathing slowly and deeply, all the way down into your abdomen? Or, is your breath short and shallow? Now shift your awareness to how you are feeling. Are you happy, calm and relaxed? Or, are you feeling stressed, agitated and anxious? I’m sure you already know that there is a real and direct link between …
Declutter 6 Areas of Your Life and Regain Your Power
Do you find it difficult to operate in a chaotic or cluttered environment? I certainly do. My stress levels rise and I find it hard to focus. My productivity, creativity and sense of wellbeing are all adversely affected. Earlier in life, I used to perceive clutter simply in terms of the things in my physical space. Nowadays my interpretation has widened considerably and extends to different parts of both my inner and outer world …
Does Worry Blight Your Life?
If there is one thing that can really cast a shadow over a person’s inner world it is worry. We all do it from time to time but for some people it becomes an incessant activity that has a direct and detrimental effect on their happiness and wellbeing. When I look back at my younger days I am stunned at how much time and energy I spent worrying. I worried about everything; exams, my health, ensuring there …
Sleep: Are you getting enough?
It may feel like losing sleep is not such a big deal but it really is. Depriving yourself of sleep has a wide range of negative effects that go way beyond just daytime drowsiness: fatigue, lethargy, and lack of motivation; moodiness and irritability; reduced creativity and problem-solving skills; inability to cope with stress; reduced immunity; frequent colds and infections; concentration and memory problems; weight gain …