The Day I Met a Goblin and Finally Healed My Fear
Have you ever experienced an intense emotion that has left you feeling frightened, confused and deeply disturbed? I certainly have.
In fact, there was a time in my life when it was a regular occurrence.
When I tell people now that I spent most of my late teens and twenties in a perpetual state of fear, due to chronic anxiety and panic disorder, I am often met with surprise; disbelief even.
Thankfully, I’m not that person anymore.
Fifteen years ago, I had a profound experience that marked a major turning point in my journey back to inner peace and personal power. This experience not only redefined my relationship with the debilitating fear I was experiencing at the time, but also armed me with a powerful self-healing tool that I use to this day, both on myself and with my clients.
I’d like to share this tool with you today.
Picture this scenario. You are living in a habitual state of fear. Life feels heavy, dark and arduous. Your days are filled with a sense of dread and constant unease.
One day, you become so sick and tired of feeling this way that you summon up the courage to see an energy healer.
Your desperation overrides the sceptical voice in your head that tells you to be wary of such things; that it’s all nonsense; that it won’t help you.
You book in for a healing session.
When the time comes, you make it to the healing centre.
And now, here you are, lying on a comfortable couch in a warm, sunlit room. A delicate fragrance fills the room. Calm, soft music plays in the background. The practitioner gets to work and helps you to relax.
You close your eyes and gently begin to unwind. Slowly, you settle into a state of tranquility.
But then, suddenly, two giant eyes appear directly in front of you!
You freeze. You realise that something is staring right at you. It looks like a goblin, but with the most enormous eyes.
What the hell is this?
Should you tell the healer that a weird creature has just appeared? But, before you know it, the image has disappeared.
That was my experience all those years ago.
Something very profound happened to me that day. I didn’t appreciate it fully at the time, but over the coming weeks I noticed that my fear had largely subsided. I no longer felt anxious the whole time.
It soon dawned on me that the goblin I had encountered during the healing session was my unconscious mind’s representation of my fear.
The healing energy had pushed it out of the shadows into the light of my awareness, and, quite literally, dissolved it.
As I recognised this, I began to use this practice of visualising difficult emotions, and focusing on them in an accepting way, in order to heal them.
I began to teach this practice to my clients, who also reported deep and positive shifts.
Here is What You Can Do
If you struggle with a recurring feeling that is difficult – it could be anything: fear, guilt, shame, grief, anger, confusion – you too can try this simple self-healing technique for yourself.
It’s important to remember a) that there are no right or wrong answers to the questions below and b) not to dwell on each answer; just go with the first thing that pops into your head.
Start by becoming aware of the feeling. Notice where in the body you are experiencing it. It could be anywhere; it may even be just outside of your body.
Take your awareness to that place and keep your focus there for a few moments. Try not to push the feeling away. Allow it to be. Simply observe it.
Now, see yourself collecting up this feeling and drawing it out of your body. Put it somewhere in front of you: on the floor, on the table, or on the bed.
Look at the feeling. What colour is it? Go with whatever immediately comes to mind.
What size is it? It may be the size of a pea or larger than a house. Just notice whatever your unconscious mind presents to you, without thinking about it.
What shape is it?
What texture does it have? Is it shiny or matte? Is it soft or hard?
Perhaps it has a smell?
You now have a clear image of what your emotion looks like. Take a moment to really observe that image closely.
If you want to, you can now go one step further.
Remember that, ultimately, all emotions are positive in nature, even if they don’t feel that way. They carry important messages from one part of our being to another. By doing so, they help us to integrate discordant parts of ourselves so that we can become whole and balanced again.
So, bearing in mind that this feeling is your friend, not your adversary, add eyes, a nose and a mouth to your image. You could also add arms and legs. You may even want to give it a name!
And there you have it: your feeling represented as a character.
Your task now is to sit with it, in a compassionate and accepting way, and to give it the attention it is seeking whenever it disturbs your peace. Don’t push it away or send it hateful energy!
If you are a meditator, you can use part of your practice to focus on it. Visualise the character sitting in front of you, and shine your love onto it.
If you like to journal, you can communicate with it through your writing. This feeling is trying to draw your attention to something in you that requires healing. The process of writing about it, or even having a dialogue with it, can help to reveal what this is.
If you are Reiki attuned, then you can heal it using your Reiki energy.
Or else, you can simply call up the image in your mind’s eye, whenever you have a few moments, and gently breathe while being aware of its presence.
Whatever you do, you want to surround this feeling with the energy of love, not push it away.
Eventually, the day will come when, like me, you find that the feeling has simply disappeared. You will be free from whatever it was that was weighing you down.
That is when you will know that your work is done.
If you feel you would benefit from working with a qualified practitioner to release the energy of blocked emotions, click here to find out about the Divine Healing service I offer.
